Navigating the social media dating apps
So if you have me on Instagram, you’ll know I recently did a poll to find out other people’s opinion of dating in 2018. Personally, I reckon it completely sucks! But at the same time, I know people who’ve had/having pretty successful relationships with dating apps, such as tinder. Read for a whole range of interesting facts and stats…
So here are my Instagram follower’s stats:
- 71% of you said a massive FU to the dating situation in 2018.
- 42% of you said you’d had absolutely terrible dating experiences.
- BUT 47% of you reckon you’d met the one through a dating app.
It was an eye-opener that 47% of you reckon you’d found the one online. I was expecting the figure to be a lot smaller! Although only about 100 people answered my poll, it’s still a good indication of how many people are regularly using these dating apps to help them start relationships.
You’ve just graduated university, now what?
According to The Student Room, 1/5 people meet ‘the one’ whilst at university. However, there are some uni courses which supposedly give grads higher chances of coming face to face with their soul mate in a lecture theatre.
These courses are:
Business / Management (27%);
Social / Policy (27%)
Marketing / Comms / Media (21%)
So according to these stats, with an undergrad in Comms (PR) and an MA in marketing, there’s a 42% chance I’ve met ‘the one’.
But I don’t think I have, so what do I do?
Entering the world of online dating.
Unless you’ve been really lucky and you’ve found the love of your life at university, you’re probably relying on friends to set you up. Or failing that, meeting someone at work. But then what do you do when you’ve exhausted both these avenues? You turn to Tinder, or Bumble or Grinder…this list goes on!
All of these apps have pretty much the same concept: quick access to people you wouldn’t otherwise have the chance to talk to. What could go wrong?
Bumbling and Tindering
Tonight I spent all night flicking between Tinder and Bumble, swiping left and swiping right. I even added a witty comment in my bio. After finally putting my phone down and feeling really pathetic, I said to my friend, ”How sad is this?” he said, ”That’s just the way things are now”.
Personally, this online dating thing isn’t for me. Call me old-fashioned, but I’d rather meet someone in person, ideally in a bar or a club. However, let’s say over the past two years, I reckon I’ve gone out on average around twice a month. Out of them fortnightly night’s out, I’d probably say no more than five men have ever tried to talk to me. That’s not exactly great statistics over two years, is it?
So now you understand why I’ve turned to tinder and bumble.
And It’s not like I’m the only person I know doing this. All my single friends are swiping along as well. But for myself, it’s just a strange concept that people would rather lay in bed at night and swipe through potential partners, instead of just trying to chat someone up in a bar.
And there are two major problems with this:
1. You now have too many options
We all know in reality, we wouldn’t have 200 people in one place all lining up to date us. It would never happen! And I’ll put my hand up and admit I get a bit carried away with my ‘requirements’. But it’s so incredibly hard not get picky and a little judgie on these apps. But we’ve all got to learn where to draw the line, haven’t we?
2. Social media isn’t always a good representation of a person
Everyone knows we just put the best bits on social media. So for a dating app, we’re even more likely to be that little bit pickier with our photo selection. Because let’s be honest, if you met someone in person, you wouldn’t see a carefully selected combination of ten filters. And that witty bio? That was probably just been copied off google!
The current dating climate is ruining our self-esteem.
Out of all of the dating apps, I’ve had experience with (well two), bumbling drives me nuts! The concept behind it, is women are meant to make the first move once matched. Leaving the man 24 hours to reply, or the match disappears.
And every single bloody time I get unmatched, I think a part of me dies instead!
I take everything super personally anyway, but bumbling can easily make you develop a complex.
Am I not pretty enough? Am I not skinny enough? Are all these other girls better than me?
It’s just basically a vicious cycle of rejection and f*uckboys, with the odd civilised conversation thrown in between for good measure.
But I feel sorry for my lad mates too. They seem to think women have such an easier time on these apps. And from my experience, I can confidently say that’s definitely not true! Both genders seem to be relying on these apps for confidence and a little boost to their self-esteem. But, after the 5th f*uckboy of the day gives me a cringe misspelt compliment, it doesn’t exactly fill me with hope.
”Your definitely the hottest lass Iv matched ha” – Tinder match, approximately 5 minutes ago.
So with men either keeping quiet as they’re scared of rejection. Or handing out compliments with terrible grammar, its no wonder female users are super frustrated!
Rounding it up
So basically, I think men need to start actually talking to girls in bars and clubs again. And the same can be said for girls…it’s 2018 after all! So instead of both genders spending their nights out taking selfies in the smoking area, to later hashtag #squadgoals. People need put their phones down, close the dating apps, and start having conversations again in real life again! Who’s with me?
What are your thoughts on the dating climate in 2018? Have you had success on one of these dating apps? Please let me know in the comments!