The period after finishing your degree is such a weird stage in life. You hold on to the nostalgia of cheap mid week drinks, and all day Netflix binges. But at the same time, you begin to grow up and realise what you want from life. And from the way I feel at the moment, I guarantee no ones going to stop me from getting what I want!
Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like I haven’t been in a relationship that benefit my life in the long term. I want someone that won’t hold me back, and will encourage me in my future career, hobbies, and life in general. However at this point in my life, I feel like just haven’t met that person. Negative relationships bring nothing but unwanted stress. And with juggling a masters, a part time job, a social life and my blog and other hobbies, I really don’t have time for that stress!
Relationships require you to work around each other schedules, think about someone other than yourself… and most likely put weight on! And these are just things I don’t want right now. Being single and new to a city has give me the push to go out and meet people, in a way that I probably wouldn’t have had if I was in a relationship. If forces you to not only push yourself, but also to rely solely on yourself. Which has probably caused me to grow up a bit!
I’ve been single for about 10 months now. And in that time I’ve graduated, moved cities, got into one of the top business schools in the country, improved my blog, toned my body, and most importantly met sooo people who I plan on staying in touch with for a very long time! My life and happiness is just constantly on the up, and I’m just not prepared to let someone come along and ruin it.
Putting myself first is something I’ve loved, and really needed after my last relationship ended. That relationship taught me what I wanted and what I needed from a relationship in the future. And till I meet the person that will make that happen, I’ll continue to stay single and enjoy living my life the way it is! Because to myself right now, that’s enough!
I asked some of my friends what they loved about single in their early 20s, here’s what they had to say:
“I like being able to do what I want, when I want. When you’re in a relationship you tend to spend your free time with that person, but when you’re single it’s nice to spend time alone or with friends and family”. – Annabel Harvey
“I can put myself first all the time I.e. I can’t be guilt-tripped or distracted from what I want to do. If I had a bf this year I would inevitably end up spending time with him when I should be working. I like not having to think about someone else when making decisions like where I want to live next year or simple things like getting a new haircut (which shouldn’t be an issue when you have a boyfriend but unfortunately can be!)” – Becky Williams
“Freedom. No one to listen to!” – Chantelle Wright
“No Commitments!” – Leanne Mackim
“You don’t have to take someone else into account. Might sound selfish, but I like having my own space and time!” – Grace McDonald
However I did ask some of my pals in relationships on their thoughts. Here’s their say:
“You have someone to share the fun times that you have during your ‘growing up’ period and they grow with you, whether you continue to grow together or end up apart, it’s sharing those times together. It’s quite nice to feel safe and be with someone because at this time in you in your life it can be quite lonely, and having someone you love there helps you through that too.” – Katy Eyre
“Spending quality time together, planning your future together, and knowing your happy.” – Cathryn Harnett
What do you think about relationships in your early 20s? What have your experiences taught you? Let me know in the comments!